So yesterday I shared the below (in bold) post on both my Instagram and Facebook pages. I don’t know why but I for so long fought between posting and not posting…… My closest friends and family knew but the thought of sharing this so publicly and putting myself completely out there scared the shit out of me! But why?
I had the mindset that people would think I was doing it for attention, posting for likes or just posting to make people feel sorry for me. What the fuck right? Ridiculous! I was so afraid to show my true self and share my true story because of the judgement of others. People who barely knew me, people who probably didn’t even care about me and because of this, I was genuinely so disappointed in myself for feeling or thinking that way. It’s not my fault I was diagnosed.
My Boob-Voyage Soirée was about to begin and to save confusion and questions around why the hell we’re at at a party dressed in pink & white with boob puns all around us I thought OK fuck it get it out of the way so you can relax and just enjoy the next 48 hours with your besties and family!! So I did…. I had finally shared the words I had written out in my notes for the last 5 days with the world!! And what a bloody relief. I decided to post what I did as I felt it could help me with my journey. I felt I was hiding a big secret & felt guilty mostly for hiding it from people I associate with regularly. I also felt that one day there might be someone who is going through something similar or currently are going through it and my story could help them as much as the blogs I have read online have.
It has been over 24 hours as I write this post and I have had the most incredible outpour of love and support from so many different people!! From strangers to distant family members and old school friends. Absolutely AMAZING! I have also already connected with other cancer survivors and battlers! I have been able to have questions answered, been given advice and they have even recommended places to find fantastic bras and wigs! So fucking cool.
I am so glad ‘I came out’ — is that the right thing to say??
Prior to yesterdays post I already felt content in my situation but with all the additional love, light & support I have received recently I feel even stronger and ready to kick this asshole diseases ass!!!
I am so extremely nervous and hesitant to post about this for some bizarre reason!!! I am posting this as I feel like it will in many ways help me through this journey I am about to embark on and honestly maybe help someone else who might one day go through something similar.
I was diagnosed with Grade 3 Invasive Breast Cancer this past Tuesday 24/04/18. Without going too much into detail; On Monday I will undergo a mastectomy on my right breast & have further treatment in the following weeks. This is a very rare thing for a 23 year to go through and I am so fucking scared! I’m more than scared actually; I’m petrified, I’m shocked, I’m confused & do you know what I’m also pretty OK… it has been a lot to take in the last couple of days but with the support of my family, my love & friends I am getting there! I am slowly accepting the fact that this is my story, this is my reality and that there is nothing I can do about it but to look on the bright side and be thankful that my situation is not any worse OR life threatening. I know with all my heart that I’m going to come out the other end of this horrible disease an incredibly strong woman. Not necessarily how I planned going about my year but I can’t wait to say I kicked Cancer in the ass because I 100% am going to!! 👊🏽
Big love to you all! Kiss and hug your nearest and dearest more than ever tonight (and every other night)
**In celebration of losing my mutant right boob my bestest have organised the most litty boob-voyage soirée for me!!! Blessed is an understatement!!**